Frustation

The accident - and I hate calling it that, as it happened due to gross carelessness - has really annoyed me. It's all the things I discover I can't do:

1. Birdwatching. Yeah, it's sad, and not very rock and roll, but I really enjoy birdwatching. Okay, I can do it, but not if I need to use my binoculars. Mmh, that'll be almost all the time. Although I can get them up to my face and they are really modern lightweight ones, I can't hold them to my eyes for any length of time.
2. Motorcycling. That's an obvious and, as I said in my last post, not until at least the middle of May.
3. Driving. Still haven't driven the car since the accident. Although my shoulder's much better and improving by the day, I still get pain when I get dressed and put on a jacket sometimes, so I'm worried I'd hurt myself changing gear and be concentrating on not hurting my shoulder, rather than driving safely. Not good.
4. Cooking. Well, until yesterday. I love cooking. It gives me a lot of pleasure cooking for my hubbie and I and for others. That said, until yesterday, I may have hurt myself while lifting a pan (even with my good side) and been totally put off dinner by the pain.
5. Gardening. I'm not the world's greatest gardener, but I try to keep my garden tidy. I had to get my parents round to cut my grass the other day.
6. DIY. Again, it's said, but I like building stuff. My hubbie and I have done most things in the house. We've friends who are doing a self-build on a former church and, prior to the accident, we would go round to help them out. Unsurprisingly, we won't be doing that for a while. And it's just at the point when our mates could probably really do with the help.
7. Photography. My hubbie and I really enjoy photography. We've a selection of film SLR cameras and a digital SLR, with a selection of lenses. Just over a week ago we were at a friend's wedding. As we enjoy photography and, even if I say so myself, pretty good, we made an album up of the photos my hubbie took. Ususally we'd both be taking photos. On Saturday, my hubbie's sister gets married and he's taking the part of father of the bride. So, I hope I've improved enough to take some photos. I'll be really annoyed if I can't.
8. Climbing. About once-twice a month, prior to the accident, my hubbie and I would take ourselves off to the EICA to do a bit of climbing. We were improving, abet slowly, but we were starting to really get into it. Goodness knows when we'll be able to go climbing again.
9. Camping. My hubbie and I enjoy camping. It's cheap, fun and a great way of seeing this beautiful country. We usually go camping for our main summer holiday. We love the freedom of just throwing the tent, sleeping bags etc in the bck of the car and heading in a general direction. I don't think that's going to happen this year. Some nights I can't get comforatble in my own bed, there's no way I'd manage on a camp mat. Also, we have a 4 man tent and it takes a reaonable amount of effort to erect, especially in a bit of a wind. There's no danger we'd manage it at the moment.
   

The list probably goes on, but you get the picture. Although it should be only short term, it's life limiting. Also, it's frustrating having to ask others to do gardening, lifts etc for me. I know they don't mind, but it's not the point. If the person who pulled out in front of my hubbie had actually looked I would be posting about the runs we'd been on our bikes - it have been pretty good weather for biking of late.

Apparently, we can claim from the other side (the insurers of the woman who caused the accident) for loss of amenity, which includes all of the things I've listed above. I'd imagine there will be potential wrangling over how much our loss of amenity is worth. I really don't care. No amount of money will make up for not being able to do the things I, we, enjoy. Things I need for my sanity and to remind me there is always more to life.

The other thing that's getting to us both is do we replace the Pan? Yes, we want to get back on the horse, but the longer the wait, the harder it'll be. Will either of us manage it? My hubbie's a big guy and even he is planning to ride my hornet for a little while to get used to using his shoulder for biking again. I may have to get a smaller bike (125 or 250) to build-up my confidence and ability again. Argh!!!

Earlier this week, my hubbie was looking at the potential replacement for the Pan. He'd always said when the Pan needed replaced, he'd want to get a Goldwing. From my prospective, it's a comfy looking pillion seat. It's also a 1800 engine flat 6! Apparently my face when I realised that was a picture of delight! That said, even an early model is £4k more than the Pan was worth. It's a lot of money to put to another bike, but hey, life's too short. We discussed the pros and cons of the Goldwing verses the Pan. Then I realised what was really annoying me. It was having to have that conversation at all. Again, if someone had looked at a junction, there would be no reason to replace the Pan and we wouldn't have even been discussing it. Well, not yet anyway!!!

Anyway, that's my rant. I'm sure everything'll be okay in the long run, but at times it doesn't feel like that.